Jokes

Discussion in 'Unrelated Discussion' started by spazzdla, October 18, 2013.

  1. mkrater

    mkrater Uber Alumni

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    Yikes! Did you have a colander? I'd just want to dump them out and rinse them ASAP. :p
  2. teju__

    teju__ Active Member

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    Nope, I had to pretty much dig them out one by one. After a while there were several people mud-raking in the livingroom, because it'd have taken too long otherwise. My friends also wanted me to keep the jelly so we could stick firecrackers in it at new years eve, but I couldn't really stand the smell so I threw away an incredibly flabby garbage-bag a few days later...
    tunsel11 likes this.
  3. arseface

    arseface Post Master General

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    What did Kermit the Frog say at Jim Henson's funeral?
    Nothing
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  4. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    I will now prove that Teletubbies are evil.

    If Teletubbies are a product of time and money, then:

    Teletubbies = Time x Money

    But, we all know time is money, so:

    Teletubbies = Money x Money = Money^2

    We know that money in the root of all evil, so:
    Money = sqrt(Evil)
    Money^2 = Evil

    Ergo,

    Teletubbies = Evil
  5. thetrophysystem

    thetrophysystem Post Master General

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    Actually, that voice is on a spectrum that can be done by literally almost any human being. It takes muscle control in the throat, but literally anyone covers that spectrum.
  6. Devak

    Devak Post Master General

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    I will now prove Geers is evil.

    If Geers is a product of time and money, then:

    Geers= Time x Money

    But, we all know time is money, so:

    Geers = Money x Money = Money^2

    We know that money in the root of all evil, so:
    Money = sqrt(Evil)
    Money^2 = Evil

    Ergo,

    Geers= Evil
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  7. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    Too bad I'm not a product of time and money.

    3987^12 + 4365^12 = 4472^12. Check it on your ten-digit calculator. SUCK IT FERMAT

    Math troll is best troll.
    Trololololololol.
  8. cwarner7264

    cwarner7264 Moderator Alumni

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    I heard they just discovered Ebola on the Zimbabwean Cricket Team.

    Now they just need to find ebatsman and efielder
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  9. mkrater

    mkrater Uber Alumni

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    How does a crazy person walk through a forest?
    They take the psychopath
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  10. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    ealol.jpg

    ealol2.jpg

    Star Citizen lore: Several years ago, Original Systems (creator of hit game Arena Commander) acquired Electronic Access and turned it into a soulless husk designed to sell you stuff.

    c wat they did thar?
    Last edited: March 11, 2015
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  11. Devak

    Devak Post Master General

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    You are a product of your parent's time and money.
  12. tatsujb

    tatsujb Post Master General

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  13. Devak

    Devak Post Master General

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    Ouch.....


    not labeling your axes that is
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  14. Devak

    Devak Post Master General

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    We dont serve hypothetical particles here.

    A tachyon walks into a bar
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  15. arseface

    arseface Post Master General

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    What do you call 4 spanish men in a boat that has a hole in it?
    Quatro cinco

    What do you call the kitten that they took with them?
    quatre cinq
  16. tatsujb

    tatsujb Post Master General

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  17. Devak

    Devak Post Master General

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    Ahh 9gag. where else could people steal their stuff from? XD
  18. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    What do you call a dead irishman?

    Lepregone.


    How do you make a programmer feel insecure?

    Tell him P=NP.
    Last edited: March 19, 2015
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  19. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    A statistician, a chemist, and a biologist go hunting. The biologist aims at a deer and fires. The bullet flies 2 metres left of the deer. The chemist tries to shoot the deer and the bullet flies 2 metres right of the deer. The statistician jumps up triumphantly and yells "we got 'im!".
  20. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    The average statistician is just plain mean.
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