Why Isn't XCOM A Movie?

Discussion in 'Unrelated Discussion' started by Geers, April 8, 2015.

  1. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    It has such amazing potential! I'd say go the Xenonauts route and set it in the sixties.

    Opening credits a montage of mysterious satellite readings from both US and USSR, strange disappearings, odd weather events, rumours and whispers of UFO sightings...

    First scene follows the story of the Iceland Incident (but take out the nukes and just have fighters shoot the UFO down), NATO and USSR forces reluctantly join together, surrounding the strange object, then the surviving alien crew start shooting, everything goes to hell. Soldiers get holes burnt through their bodies, tanks melt and explode as laser blasts hit fuel and ammo. Human forces endure with numbers, but the gunshots and lasers heard through radio by officers in bunkers, screams of the dying, aliens detonate their power source annihilating everything. In a dark meeting room US president and USSR premier shake hands and agree to cover up events, rubber stamp hits a folder titled "XCOM Project" with "classified" or "top secret" or whatever.

    Skip forward a few years, a radar alarm goes off in an underground base. Fighters are scrambled, UFO is intercepted despite showing considerable flight and combat prowess, fighters limp back to base. A team of six fresh out of training armed with basic infantry uniforms and standard-issue weapons is flown to crash site in a helicopter (make it a chinook like in the Xenonauts. They're underused in movies). Team lands in the dark, fire in the distance, team is uneasy, afraid, up against an enemy they have no information on, with unknown motives, the only known fact being a possession of vast technological superiority. Soldiers creep through cornfield toward UFO, door is opened by some means, a tense firefight ensues, mostly consisting of the soldiers hiding behind cover, trying to get a glimpse of the enemy in order to fire. Soldiers eventually succeed, call in the all clear and are helicoptered back to base.

    In some labs, scientists inspect alien equipment and perform autopsies as generals watch. Lead scientist not played by Morgan Freeman informs generals that over time, the equipment can be adapted for human use.

    At this point I don't know what to do. something something another mission. Something something different aliens, larger UFOs, something something alien technology adapted and given to soldiers, new fighters equipped with plasma missiles and stuff like that. Something something mission which ends with alien inflicting psychic attack, but is killed quickly. Six soldiers show character progression by going from intimidated recruits to battle-hardened veterans.

    Generals reason that psychic alien must be a leader of some sort and demand capture. Crew given stun weapons determined to be effective based on autopsy reports. Soldier who suffered psychic attack declares it too dangerous, but is convinced by his team. Everyone goes to get some rest.

    Team wakes up to blaring alarms. Large UFO has been detected by radar. Epic jets based on stolen tech fly out to intercept. Jets engage escort fighters and despite some losses succeed in bringing down UFO. Team is flown out, kitted with advanced armour and plasma weapons in futuristic dropship. Team moves in, now confident and professional. Encounters resistance in UFO, they fight there way to the bridge.

    Bridge is lit only by display panels. The team leader advances forward, then drops to his knees, clutching his head *insert psychic sound effect*, another solider stands from cover and asks if they're ok. Leader shoots at soldier, wounding them in the arm. Another solider spots psychic alien, team infers their trusted friend is mind-controlled. Mind-controlled soldier advances, team must act. One dives to another piece of cover, then another soldier pops up and kills their friend and commanding officer. Team member who rolled to another piece of cover dives at psychic alien and zaps it with stun weapon. Distraught team call in the all-clear.

    Team is now off-duty, with one dead, one wounded, and one psychologically tormented by their actions. Scientist comes in with report from interrogation. Alien turns out to be a complete coward and spills the beans on everything. Aliens consider humanity potential future threat and thus want to neutralize us while they can. Species of captured alien "commander" revealed to be the leaders of interstellar empire, with other races assimilated into their ranks (thus explaining the diverse species in previous encounters). Humans intended to succumb to same fate (thus explaining reasons for abductions and experiments).

    Also revealed is the alien's ace in the hole: *insert idea that cannot be defeated with the simple argument of "why didn't they just do that in the first place?"* One member down, team jet off to alien capital ship which is in the atmosphere because of said idea to defeat alien menace once and for all. Humans win.

    During-credits footage shows worldwide celebrations, XCOM remains active to hunt pockets of alien survivors.


    Post-credit scene: Queen stares into mirror, smiles, hologram stutters, Queen revealed to be lizardman in disguise.


    Advanced fighters based on stolen alien tech should look something along these lines:

    [​IMG]

    Alien propulsion tech means aerodynamics are not the highest concern.

    UFOs must must MUST retain the circular design elements, because at this point anything else at this point would just be generic. When was the last time you saw a badass saucercraft in a movie? That's right! NEVER!

    [​IMG]

    And yes, I know about that TV show that did the XCOM thing. But when I looked up the first episode on youtube I couldn't watch it because it looked so campy and ridiculous.

    And don't actually attach it to XCOM or Xenonauts. Because then it's a video game movie and they'll do that wrong because they'll do what they always do and try to copy-paste the game into a movie. That ain't gonna work. Just use the ideas! the ideas are cool!

    That's enough procrastinating for now.
  2. tatsujb

    tatsujb Post Master General

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    technically it already is.

    what with a bazillion alien invasion movies.
    tunsel11 likes this.
  3. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    Yeah but they're mostly crap. And they're all ACTION MARINES HOO-AH I DIDN'T SIGN UP FOR THIS!

    I'd like this to be more like a thriller, with tension and not overly-heavy on the action. Plus the focus on a squad gives you excellent space for character growth as they go from mission to mission, learning more about their enemy.

    No alien movie has ever created that ominous feeling of dread and despair as people go up against an enemy they know NOTHING about. It's always soldiers just creeping towards a door and you already know what's gonna happen: Alien bursts out of door or somewhere else, shoots people. Then either dies and some one-dimensional character says a crappy one-line joke, or the alien just runs off.
  4. tatsujb

    tatsujb Post Master General

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    you mean Skyline (2010)?

    fantastic movie, btw.

    absolutely non traditional. starts off all cabin in the woods-like, tricks you into thinking it's typical, then turns all original-like. like a whole new director took over.

    perhaps everything you're looking for
  5. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    Cities Skylines came out this year and has nothing to do with aliens!

    I can't remember if I've seen it, or I stumbled across the last twenty minutes while flipping through channels and just left it on. UAVs shooting at the big blue alien ship?
  6. tatsujb

    tatsujb Post Master General

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    yup
    [​IMG]
  7. tehtrekd

    tehtrekd Post Master General

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    Hm, it definitely has potential, but it'd have to be handed to a VERY good director.

    The biggest red flag I have is length.
    XCOM games covers an entire war, as soon as the aliens attack you are witnessing everything they do until you defeat them, an average playthrough can last 10-15 hours.
    A movie would feel more like a highlight reel. I get the feeling that we'd see a terror mission (where a child and/or dog would die because of course they'd do it), the base assault and the final fight with the Uber Ethereal. The rest of the movie would be intro, conclusion and some stuff in XCOM base.

    Not a huge problem but if handled incorrectly it would be rushed at best, or sequel-bait at worst.
    Last edited: April 8, 2015
    tatsujb likes this.
  8. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    True but... I WANNA SEE IT.

    Could work as a TV show I guess.
  9. tehtrekd

    tehtrekd Post Master General

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    Hmm.
    Hmm indeed...

    After watching the surprisingly good Flash TV series, I'd be so down to see an XCOM series.
  10. Geers

    Geers Post Master General

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    My concern would be the people in charge of the studio going: "OH GOD WE NEED TO MAKE PEOPLE WATCH THIS NERD CRAP! QUICK PUT A HOT CHICK WHO CAN'T ACT IN IT FOR A SEX SCENE WE CAN USE IN ADS!"
  11. squishypon3

    squishypon3 Post Master General

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    And then it turns out on the show she dies in the 3rd episode! After people get interested. >:3
  12. arseface

    arseface Post Master General

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    I'd be concerned if they didn't add a hot chick too.

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