Pro vs Pro Mickey Cantor lines? Also more Pitgirl warnings!

Just as Mickey Cantor has lines for people getting killed by bot types, why not have lines for the outcomes of specific Pro matchups along with his usual "What the What!? Where did that play come from?" or his comments on kill-streaks? Fall for a sniper trap and take a bullet? Mickey Cantor will make a bad pun about murder in cold blood. Assassin gets the jump on another Assassin? His Truly will have a quip about girl-on-girl action! The possibilities and potential hillarity are endless!

Edit: And on a more serious note Pitgirl should warn the team when their turrets go down: "Watch out now Icemen! Your base is wide open, unless you want your moneyball down you should go keep an eye on it!"

"Hotshots your turrets got blown right to kingdom come, better go babysit the nubs until they heal!"

To individual Pros: "Your gremlins got themselves destroyed! You wanna spawn some more?"

"I'm afraid your gapshots ain't shootin' no more."

"Them Bouncers aren't doin' much Bouncing, what with bein' in pieces..."

"Your Scramblers got Scrambled!"

"Your Buzzers finished doin' their job! Whether they did it right or not is up to you."

To the whole team: "The Hotshots/Icemen cracked your Jackbot wide open!"

Re: Pro vs Pro Mickey Cantor lines?

It's a good idea . . .

hmm An assault kills a support - "I've heard of Assault and Battery, but never an assault ON a battery! Get it . . . cause supports charge other . . . aw forget it!"

Re: Pro vs Pro Mickey Cantor lines?

When killed by a ringout: "Ooh, I hope that Pro doesn't land on anyone!"
Shurikens kill a Deployed Gunner: "Oooh! Gunner Out-gunned by an Assassin! They may be small, but they're deadly sharp, never doubt the shuriken launcher!"
Tank: "And who says Assassins can't kill Tanks? He'll have a hard time picking shurikens out of his armor, folks."

I love these lines

"Stay tuned for a new episode of Meet the Meatsacks! Estelle gets an Itchy Finger because of the latest fad, only to find it malfunctions. When she tries to switch back to mother nature's finger, she finds out it's been sold to a hobo! Also Billy gets addicted to Spunky Cola and comes up with ludicrous schemes to make money to pay for his fix."

Re: Pro vs Pro Mickey Cantor lines?

This so much.

Support kills an Assassin:
"Tried to stab him in his back, while he hacked, but got tracked and so was SMAAAACKED!"

Assassin grapple kills another Assassin:
"So do you have to be invisible to see invisible? Is that how that works?"

Gunner/Sniper Grapple kill any Pro:
"I'm pretty sure that's not how you're supposed to use that, but hey! Whatever works!"

Gunner Kills Tank -
Yeah, but can you beat him in a pie eating contest?"

Tank Kills Gunner-
"Why don't you pick on someone your own size? Oh. Wait. You did!"

Assault kills Assassin
"You're leaving a trail of broken hearts! And Bones!"

Sniper kills Assassin-
"You know it's that kind of behavior that keeps you single. Of course, I should know! Hiiii-oooooh!"

Support Kills Sniper-
"Buh . . . wha . . . guh? Seriously? Well dang, now I lost a bet."

Sniper kills Gunner -
"OK, but that was easy. Try it again with you're eyes closed! C'mon . . . I dare ya!"

Tank Kills Sniper -
"Sniper Rifles are the past. But Rail Guns- they're the fu- well, I guess they're the present really."

Gunner kills Assault-
"So that's what happens when an immovable object meets a completely stoppable force! I guess it really isn't a surprise in retrospect."

On the subject of being informed when your turrets are down I propose this. When you build a turret you can have a small icon by your ammo count on you weapons. If the turret in question was being injured you could have it flashing and so if you find yourself in the inconvienet situation of playing with folks you don't know (me everyday) then you could properly take care of your turrets and base.

Shurikens fired at the crowd: "Is she pissed at the world or tossing out souvenirs? We'll never know folks."

Killled when upgrading skills: "Ya know I didn't mean upgrade them -RIGHT NOW-? Be a little more careful, all my money's riding on YOU!"

Icemen win: "And it looks like the Icemen take the cup! Well, that's another five hundred thousand negative for Mickey Cantor. Ya know, I never thought I'd say this but I'm GLAD to be in prison! Safe and sound! HIIII-OOOOOH!"

Buzzer Spawn: "Hey folks, if a Buzzer gets lost and flies your way do not, I repeat DO NOT try to catch it. Just remember what happened to the Jacobson Family and seats A10-A15."

Upon starting a private match completely alone: "It's pros versus pros tonight at the--wait....WHERE IS EVERYONE!? Fifty thousand people turn out for this fifteen minute game and only one Pro is on the field? I had bets running on the Hotshots, too! Now what am I supposed to do?"

Round 500 of Sudden Death: "Folks I'm required to remind you that no matter how long the line is you are NOT to make any unauthorized use of the VIP restrooms no matter how badly you have to go. Also peeing in the halls will result in death or injury by Janibot. Thank you."

Round 1000: "Monday Night Combat officials are not responsible for any pickpocketings you may suffer from falling asleep in your seat."

Round 1500: "I lost count on how many Jackbots have been destroyed, folks, that's how crazy this game is getting!"

Losing Sudden Death after 750+ Rounds: "And that's the game at last, folks, what an/a group of achiever(s)! Complimentary Regenegreat can be found in the dispensers in the back of your seats to help get the feeling back into your legs. Goodnight everybody!"

Losing after 3000 rounds: "Wow. Just WOW! I can't believe you guys! I actually won that bet! Finally! Mickey Cantor's out of debt! It's...it's a miracle, it's AMAZING! A BRAND NEW DAY!!! HIIII-OOOOOOOOH!"

THREAD NECROBUMP
Sniper SMG's an Assault to death
First time: "Wow! I didn't see that coming! That Assault just got a taste of his own medicine."
Second time: "Man, that Assault must be having a bad day, folks."
Third time: "Either that's a damn good Sniper or a bad Assault. Either way, it's fun to watch HI-HOOOOH!"
Assassin grapples an Assault or Tank out of a Charge: "The Assassin also has several strands from unidentified bull-fighters. Just a little fun fact for ya there."

yes... this is delicious...

click both those urls, it needs that much emphasis.

this idea might not be doable or worth the devs time overall, but man wouldnt this be great. sequels gotta have these, they couldnt put enough of these in a game

This is true, but the Sudden Death lines would add a lot of spice to it to keep those who shoot for records entertained. On that note!
Annihilator is used one hundred times total: "Zzzz...zzz...wha...?...oh. right. Hotshots with the annihilator. Again."

Awesome

10awesomes.

Mickey Cantor:

Assault:
Killing another Assault:
"Talk about a "black-out", folks!"

Tank:
Killing Assassin:
"Why'd ya kill her? I think she had the HOTS for ya! HI-OHHHHHHHH!"