Assassin's Sufferage: Replace the Sword with a Broom

Like any child of the 80's, I have an unhealthy, sometimes sexually (Oh so sexually) unhealthy, obsession with ninja's. So imagine my mirth when I see the assassin! And since we're in Imagination Land, imagine my not-so-mirth when I read all I'm supposed to do is clear the lanes for my little Robot buddies.

Assassin, in definition, is supposed to be a killing machine, but lets face it, that would be broken. So, instead I am relegated to Cyber Janitor and "Scavenger". Now, seeing as I have only one ranged attack, and a sword, I'd figured the grapples or strikes with the sword would be insanely damaging to offset the fact that I have to be so close to my opponent to use it that we could be legally related. instead, she gives cute love taps and is subsequently either counter grappled for a OHK, ringout, or the "Its not you, its me" routine. To easily fix this, and since the grapples usually STAB THE OPPONENT IN THE HEAD, I would suggest a little stun effect for a half a second just to prevent counter grapples.

To counter this, front grapples should be non lethal unless the guy is pissing on death's door as it is, back grapples, on the other hand, should be insta-kills always, especially since the Assassin is a fan of the Colonel and seems to never wash her greasy hands, resulting in the grapples working like 75% of the time. And really, if you're dumb enough to be sitting there and LET one sneak up on you, you REALLY REALLY DESERVE IT, since the stealth cloak might as well be the lampshade disguise seen in so many Looney Toons.

But for now, all I'm supposed to do with my badass training is clean up bot poop and make babies, so really I want the sword replaced by a broom, take off her shoes so she's barefoot, make her earn half as much as the other Pro's, and, what the hell, Lemme knock her up, you're only halfway there.

Agreed. Well, except that I don't think she should get 1-shot kills to a tank. And btw, I'm getting sick of the "assassins are for clearing bots" argument. EVERY class is supposed to clear bots - THAT'S WHAT WINS THE GAME! And tanks are the best bot clearers, not assassins. Infact Assassins aren't the best bot clearers, tanks are, and they're on par with snipers ONLY when they have level 3 passive for the sword. Otherwise they're in the middle of the pack.

And the way assassins are right now, you are FORCED to have an armor sponsor. When they lose cloak during grapples in the upcoming patch, you will be forced to give your gold to armor. They need to up the damage on daggers and swords or change something about the way shurikens work, or something to counter this. Faster grapple recovery after a miss isn't going to cut it; it's just going to put them on par with everyone else's grapple-miss recovery.

i find u very unknowledgable about the assassin. the sniper with level 3 passive isnt even close to as fast as an unupgraded assassin at clearing bots. the assassins charge is a 1hit bot kill. and defense isnt necessary if u use the proper stabbing technigue of getting far behind ur enemy and using a charge then a grapple to almost always kill them before they can react. if u fail pop a smokebomb and fly away as fast as u can cuz u move so fast most classes have trouble finishing u

I find you very unknowledgeable about every other class but the assassin. You put far too much faith in the assassin to the point of becoming unrealistic about common encounters and what happens the majority of the time in most situations. You take the highlight reel and pretend it's what happens on every play, so to speak.

A sniper with with level 3 can 3-shot blackjacks, and with a rate of fire endorsement can down them as fast as an assassin, and not only that, he can fire through one group of bots and do damage to a second group, and do alot of damage to any pros in the area effect blasts (or one unlucky enough to walk infront of a direct bullet).

Even theoretically, we'll pretend that every single time you encounter a group of 3 bots you level all of them in one charge. The amount of time it takes you to run over to the second group even while sprinting, and charge again and then still have to finish off 1 or 2 bots, especially if they're blackjacks, is the same amount of time a sniper can take them out from afar without risking death (usually). At best, they take down the lane in equal time if you're a good sniper and headshot the bots (which yes, does alot more damage). If you position yourself right, you can headshot multiple bots and make sure all your shots count.

The assassin is not the ultra-mega bot clearer that everyone pretends they are simply because they're nerfed in other areas. Everyone can clear bots, and infact just about everyone does it equally maybe save for the gunner and assault, and a level 3 passive gunner with mortars doesn't do too bad of a job either. And honestly I don't really play assault so I don't know much about how well their upgraded bomb is so they may be better at it than I think.

I really just think your arguments stem from putting too much hope and faith into the class, possibly because you may not be as good at other ones or don't enjoy them as much, so you mentally brace yourself for that by amping up the assassin in your mind, making yourself believe they're alot more effective than they actually are. Idk, that's just the way I read into it anyway.

Oh and for reference, my 3 most played classes are Support, Sniper, and Assassin, with a little more time in support but they're relatively equal and I'm a few games away from level 80, all while playing alone, so it's not like I have little experience with the classes or something.

The only thing I read was the title.

GIVE ME A BROOM.

Why do all Assassins think their class sucks? Just because it isn't as OP as the warlock in World of Warcraft doesn't mean it needs upgraded. First off you need to learn to use Shurikens they are your best friend.

Here's what I usually do as an Assassin...
Step 1: Run around cloaked until you spot your victim.
Step 2: Shuriken them just enough to get them to start looking around for you.
Step 3: Smoke bomb jump then instantly cloak yourself. Try to land next to them preferably behind them.
Step 4: Before they regenerate health grapple them as quick as you can. Re-cloak in the middle of the grapple.
Step 5: LUNGE! Use the RB button to perform a quick lunge attack at your weakened foe.
Step 6: If for some reason they are still alive...smoke bomb them to leave them blind and either lunge again or melee them.

I honestly don't understand why people are always saying "smokebomb them" Smokebomb takes WAY to long to use, has a MINUSCULE blind duration and is only really effective if you're not under heavy fire, and not within charge/lunge/minigun/deathblossom/grapple/slam/airstrike/shotgun/etc. range

Trying to smokebomb right after performing a non-lethal grapple is a good way to get your *** beat against most characters. By the time it goes off you'll be counter-grabbed, flying off the map from a charge or slam, or catch a shotgun blast with your teeth.

assassins wont be able to cloak mid grapple anymore, if they jump ur screwed, if they spot you ur screwed, if you dont land behind them your screwed (which is extremely likely) if you land in frotn of them even if cloaked your fall damage will give you away and your screwed, if your grab fails you cant smokebomb jump out of it so your screwed.

I'm confused. What does the assassin's right to vote have to do with anything?

WOW!!!! Another thread crying about the assassin. Been about 3 minutes since I've seen one. Learn to play OP. The assassin is much more than what she appears to be. I wish they'd yank her right out of the damn game. Tired of joining matches where 1/2 the team or more are assassins. Learn to play other classes, so pathetic already. I can't wait for the fix so that maybe people will try to do more than use her. Her playstyle is fine the way it is, fix the exploits with her and GTG.

This a trend nowadays? Claim everything someone says is false, provide no reasons and no answers. Also throw in some insults for good measure?

Seriously, dude. You have gotta be one of the densest guys up in this piece. First of, She is NOT fine...well yeah she is, but not like gameplay wise, especially when: Second: your all encompassing strat to "fix" the Assassin is to "HERP PLAI SUMWAHN ELZ DERP :U ", and lastly, since I'm sure the acne you surely suffer from has effected thine peepers: I'm offering constructive criticism in a jovial manner, and the only thing you can kill faster than the fun mood of my threads is the libido of any woman that looks at you.

I'm gonna call you "Gandalf" because you should *POOF* BITCH BEGONE!!

:lol: :lol: :lol:
but you missed an obvious one pertaining to his avatar!!
You know what his avatar is? thats all the money he's been saving on not have a significant other!

Today I was playing with someone who had been using assassin since the game started. I saw him go 20+ kills most games. I realised how he was doing it after an hour or so, he was just constantly using juice.

Assassins biggest downfall for an offensive force are base turrets. His stratergy was to just kill bots constantly, stay safe, and build up juice. He would spend often spend money on juice as well, isntead of upgrading certain skills.

Use the juice to rinse the enemies base of their turrets. This gives assassins free run of the enemies base without as much danger and the kills start racking up, especially with the kills that can be gained from using juice in the enemies base as well. =)

Assassins biggest strength = JUICE!

This.

It's why I have juice as my gold endorsement.

Gold: Juice
Silver: Skill Recovery
Bronze: Speed

Yes, and it has been this way for about 6 years. The reason being, if you can say "wrong!" and link it with personal insults, the majority of sheep will go, "HAHAHAHAHAHAH, he's wrong AND he's a poopie-head!! He's so right, people like that are total poopie-heads!! LMFAO! I really like this guy.", and then they jump in the thread to support the poopie-head-caller. The people making the original insult know this, and that's why they do it.

They know that if they actually get into a real discussion or debate, they'll likely lose/be proven wrong, or at the very least be very strongly counter-pointed, so mentally they go, "Eh, why go through all that hassle when I can just say the guy is wrong and call him a poopie-head and 6 people will come in and back me up, making him look bad, which will effectively silence his argument anyway, or the very least take it so far off track we'll never get back on it and it'll get forgotten and left 2 pages behind in the thread, and then we can debate something totally off-topic and trivial and come into a dead-lock stand-still over a debate about something small that will never end because both sides have a point, and keep it there until the whole thread dies off. Then I wont even have to deal with any of it at all, and should someone go back and look at the thread, it'll look like I won because I have supporters."


And, why do people come and support it the poopie-head caller? Because when they start to see an intelligent conversation, or good points, they're reminded of how they themselves can't hold their own and they've been embarassed by "nerds who's whole life is a video game" who prove them wrong, and they get back at that portion of society by jumping into another guy's thread and going, "YEAH!! HE'S A POOPIE-HEAD RAWWW YEAH!!!!! YOU'RE WRONG AND STUPID AND IGNORANT, THE WORD TV TAUGHT ME TO USE EVEN THOUGH IT DOESN'T APPLY TO THIS SITUATION YEAH!!!!! GTFO!!".

They support each other like brothers. Now none of them will admit this, and no there's no conspiracy and infact the ones who jump into the thread don't even realize this is why they're doing it themselves, they don't think about it, it's just something they do subconsciously. But that's how it works, it is what it is. It's something I've noticed over years and years of harsh debates on forums. It's not even a theory to me anymore, it's a fact, and anyone who's smart that doesn't agree with me right now, will see in time that it's true. It just might take you more forum experience for your eyes to open is all.


Infact, this is how many politicians and political debates go, which is where I think people may be learning it from without realizing it. One party does it as a staple and foundation, but I wont get into that or mention which it is. They know they're doing it too, and the other sides knows they're doing it, but the whole point is the side that's doing it knows the public will turn into a bunch of frenzied, "YEAH! Other guys a POOPIE-HEAD!! And he's WRONG!" freaks, and will never actually look into the issue themselves to find the truth. They prey on that and it's what helps keep their party in power in gets them votes.

It reminds me of the citizens in that one comedy movie with Luke Wilson and that girl from SNL who get frozen in a machine and wake up like 500 years later and find that they're the smartest people in the world now because the rest of the world degraded into a bunch of dumbasses. Remember the scene where they're in court and can't even plead his case because the opposing lawyer says something like, "He did it! Obviously, I mean just look at him.", and then he makes fun of the way he talks and everyone starts laughing and goes, "Yeah!! He's guilty and he does talk funny!! He's guilty put him in jail!!" and everyone goes, "YEAH!!! PUT HIM IN JAIL!!". That's 100% exactly what happens on forums. That same mentality and same domino effect/situation.

You're thinking of "Idiocracy". Great Movie

BTW You truelu are a Super Genius

Aww, i wanted to reply with the name of the movie.

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I think your giving them too much credit here.